ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I know her cup size but not her name....
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
