All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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