I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
