found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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