my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
