How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
