Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I wish you could order shots online.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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