My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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