I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize