You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
