Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
