In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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