you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
