You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
