dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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