Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
The convent might be a nice break from real life
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
