You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize
