I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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