And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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