Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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