Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
