Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
