I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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