Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
