Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
