is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize