It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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