i think i have herpe
just one?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
