She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
