oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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