I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Randomize
