we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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