when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Randomize