I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
