Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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