I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
