She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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