One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
