We're facebook friends in real life
oh god the rape fog is back!
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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