Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
