____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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