i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
