I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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