this will be a night to untag.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
