It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
i think i just lost a toe
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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