its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
