i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
