Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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