Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize