his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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