I like my sex mixed with concussions.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize